From USA Today:

Nutritionists have long warned of the perils of hot dogs: fat, sodium and preservatives to name a few.

Now, the American Academy of Pediatrics wants foods like hot dogs to come with a warning label — not because of their nutritional risks but because they pose a choking hazard to babies and children.

Better yet, the academy would like to see foods such as hot dogs “redesigned” so their size, shape and texture make them less likely to lodge in a youngster’s throat. More than 10,000 children under 14 go to the emergency room each year after choking on food, and up to 77 die, says the new policy statement, published online today in Pediatrics. About 17% of food-related asphyxiations are caused by hot dogs.

How about having a little faith in parents to actually be responsible for their children?  I’m a mom, and it’s not exactly rocket science to figure out how to feed your kids.  Mushed up food first.  Then easy to chew finger foods like Cheerios or diced fruit.  As they get more teeth and more control over their mouth and throat muscles, you can move into bigger and better things like hot dogs or carrot sticks.  Parents should use their brains and rely on common sense a little bit more, instead of on government to take care of their every parenting question.

Afternoons are crazy in my house.  Just after 2, Thing 2 will wake up screaming from her nap, if she went to sleep at all.  If not, then I’ll usually rescue her from her evil crib at that time.  Then we fight over what she should have for a snack.  She always wants a cupcake.  And I always say, “No cupcake!”  At which point she collapses into a fit of sobs and tears.  Eventually she’ll decide that she really does want the cheese/fruit/triscuits/other tasty wholesome snack, pick it up off the floor where’s she’s thrown it and eat it.

After that debacle, it’s usually time to go pick up Thing 1 from school and run an errand or two.  Today we had to get some new tires for my truck.  We went to Costco because I had some giftcards, plus you can get ice cream while you wait.  Into the tire center.  I know I need two at least, but think, “Hmm, do I really want to be back here in 3-6 months to replace the other two?  Nope!”  So I order up four new tires.  The very polite service guy rattles of a price of eight hundred dollars and change.  I’m not sure exactly, he lost me at eight hundred.  Two new tires will be just fine thankyouverymuch.  I tried not faint or choke or vomit as I forked over enough money to buy a plane ticket to Hawaii.  Then I spent some time day dreaming about Hawaii.

Of course I was slammed back to reality when Thing 1 tipped over Thing 2’s stroller in the tire department at Costco.*

Thankfully there was no line, so it was only a 45 minute wait.  We got some ice cream to share and I got a diet coke.  I haven’t been buying it regularly any more, because I can’t find find a twelve pack for less than $5, and let’s face it: that’s extortion.  I blissfully sipped my chemically caffeinated goodness while Things 1 & 2 raced to see who could eat more ice cream faster.  Turns out Thing 1, although she paid for it dearly with a massive brain freeze that I refused to listen to her whine about.

New tires, sugared up children, and a broke Jenny headed home.  I opened up my laptop and tweetdeck, trying to ignore the cacophony of, “I don’t want to do my homework!!!” and “Cupcake!” surrounding me.  And I saw avatar pics of terminator sheep with glowing red eyes.  And lots of tweets with the hashtag #demonsheep.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?

So I tweeted: Whiskey Tango Foxtrot is with the #demonsheep??

And I was immediately rewarded with links.  I love Twitter.  It satisfies my impatient nature.

The evil terminator demon sheep appear in an ad for Carly Fiorina, a sometimes fiscally conservative running for the republican nod to run against Senator Please-Don’t-Call-Me-Ma’am-Boxer in California.  The ad slams an even more liberal republican than herself, Tom Campbell. And for some reason, it’s filled with demon sheep.

It made my whole day.

Demon Sheep

*No toddlers were harmed in the making of this post.  Unless you consider cupcake denial to be harmful.  In which case, it was torturous.